Nights Like These
by Ababy99
Summary: One Shot. Brooke POV. NB. And it’s always the nights like these that it’s the hardest for me to fall asleep. R


**Nights Like These**

**Nathan and Brooke. One Shot. Brooke POV**

**--**

And it's always the nights like these that it's the hardest for me to fall asleep. The nights when the wind is blowing so hard that the branches from the trees tap against my window with amazing force, and every so often when I open my eyes my room lights up from the lightning. It's those nights where the thunder booms so loudly that I think my house is swaying along with the wind. It's these nights when I have that same dream. The dream that I've been having for a month or so now. With one more flash of lighting I turn on my light and hold my cherished teddy bear close to me. I know it seems childish and so un-Brooke like, but it's what gets me through these nights. I look over at the picture of Nathan and I which I only take out at night when I know I won't be expecting any visitors.

The dream. It's always the same. It's Nathan. He's holding me close telling me that he'll never let me go and that he loves me. Always and forever. People always thought that was his and Haley's "thing", but the truth of the matter was that he and I started that whole thing. I can hear his voice echo through my head.

"I love you…Always," he had said to me.

"And forever," I replied.

I leaned against the headboard on my bed and bit my bottom lip. I took in the scent of the bear which still smelled of him. It was the last gift he had given to me before the accident. I still can't think about it without breaking down to tears which is what I'm doing right now. I still remember Haley calling me in hysterics.

"It's Nathan," she cried.

I held the phone tighter to my ear, "What's wrong?"

"He's been in an accident."

Nothing else was said. I had hung up the phone and got into my car and raced to the hospital. It was a night like tonight; the rain was falling hard, there was lighting and thunder. I can still remember the look on Haley's face when I had walked into the hospital. It was a look of complete shock and horror. Her face was red and her eyes were watering. I looked over and even Dan was crying; which is the only emotion I've ever seen him show.

I did get to see him. Everybody did. I suggested I go last. I waited and I waited until Peyton finally walked out and told me that I could go in. In front of everyone I had not cried. I had comforted everybody else but myself. When I reached his room that's when I broke down; he was laying there. I walked over slowly and grabbed his hand maybe hoping that he would somehow wake up, but the doctor had already told us all that there was no chance which is why I think he gave every one the opportunity to say their last goodbyes. It was one of those moments where I just didn't want to let go. A moment where I just wanted to hit a rewind button on life and go back to a night when I was with Nathan. The last thing we had said to each other was that we loved one another, and the last thing we did was had sex.

Even though he was married to Haley I never felt as though I was being used by him, and in my mind I never felt I was betraying Haley. We loved each other and you can't help who you love. Our relationship had started when Haley left and Lucas and I became friends. I didn't want Lucas; that was the truth. I had realized over the last couple of years that Lucas wasn't the guy for me. I knew in my heart he was in love with Peyton.

I can still remember walking into Nathan's apartment and seeing him sitting there with his head in his hands crying. I had never really seen Nathan cry which is why the scene was so shocking to me. He looked up when I had closed the door behind me and he wiped his eyes quickly. I looked around the apartment and saw a keyboard broken into pieces on the floor. I walked over to him and put my arms around him and told him that it was okay to cry. I even made a little joke to try and get him to laugh…And he did. We sat there. Just the two of us for hours. Just talking. And I realized at that moment Nathan just needed somebody to listen to him. He didn't need me to bad mouth Haley which I was on the verge of doing; he just needed me to hear him and to listen, which is what I did.

And this had become a regular thing for Nathan and me. I would go to his apartment and we would sit down and I'd listen. He would cry and I'd be the one there with a shoulder to cry on. It had finally been a whole week with Haley gone and I had convinced him to get a shower and come out with me. He finally agreed. I just remember we walked hand in hand by the river and sat on a park bench till the moon lit up the sky. That's when he looked down at me and kissed me. It wasn't some regular kiss that you get from a boyfriend or some drunken kiss at a party; it sent a sudden warmth through my body and that's when I knew I was falling in love with this boy.

And as I looked down at his body in this hospital bed I just wanted to go back to that moment and relive it over and over again. Sure, Haley had come back and confessed her love for him and they did get back together, but he told me I was always his girl. He had told me that he loved me and that he didn't want me to feel like I was his girl on the side. And call me a slut, call me a whore, but all I wanted was to be _something_ to Nate…And I was. I was **his** girl. We loved each other, and nothing could cut through the bond that we had made.

I looked around the room now and noticed that my hands are shaking. It was going to take everything inside of me to walk out of this room without completely falling and sobbing to the floor. I leaned over him and kissed him on the lips.

"Goodbye Nate. I love you."

A boom from the thunder snaps me out of my daze and I touch my wet cheek wondering to myself when I'll be able to think about Nathan and not cry. I know that it's going to be never. The funeral was miserable; everyone in that room cried, and when Whitey got up in spoke it really made me realize how much I missed Nathan. I now look outside and wonder why the hell Nathan was driving in the first place. I shake my head violently to try and get the memory of the hospital out of my head. I keep the light on, but I decide to try and get back to sleep.

And it's the nights like these when I finally fall back asleep that I pray that the dream comes back, because for that split moment Nathan and I will be together again.

**The End**


End file.
